Losing Count
by Hannah-Dauntless
Summary: I'm indestructible. Knives just tickle, bullets leave faint bruises, fire makes me sweat, and hanging my self is like a twisted ride. I can't end it. I can't escape. There's no way out of this never ending life. My name is Four. I look twenty-five years old, but I've lost count on how old I actually am. (c)
1. Prologue

**Losing Count**

****Summary: ****Tobias Eaton lives a life most people would see as a gift, but to him it's a curse. He lives an immortal life. He has lived the past few hundred years mourning over his wife Beatrice. Over these centuries he has met many Beatrice doppelgangers and each one acts the same and looks the same. The problem is that he has fallen in love with each one of them and each one ends up dying shortly after they meet Tobias. What happens when Tobias meets a Tris instead of a Beatrice?

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Prologue

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. **

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**The Past**

Sobs full of pain travel continuously throughout the house. It tortures me. Her achy wails pain me. The pain they put me through is almost on the same level of pain that she's experiencing.

It kills me that I can't help her.

I rest my head on my clammy palms. I don't know how much more of this I can handle. I feel like I may go insane.

Then it happens. Her screams come to a halt. I lift my head from my hands and listen attentively. A new sound dances in my ears.

A baby's cry.

My eyes widen when the realization hits me. I'm officially a father. A huge smile finds its way to my face.

"Tobias?" My eyes snap towards the bedroom door, and see Victoria standing in the doorway.

Victoria is many things. She's our neighbor, Beatrice's best friend, one of the local doctors, and bossy, very bossy. We're lucky she was at home tonight, I don't know what we would've done without her.

"You can come see your son now." she wipes her crimson colored hands on her tan dress, leaving behind a prominent stain.

The smile that was already resting on my lips is now twice the size. I feel my cheeks starting to burn, but I'm too ecstatic to care. "Son?"

A cheeky smile dances across her lips. "Go be with your new family. I'll see the Eaton Family tomorrow, okay?"

"Okay. Thank you Tori."

"It's no problem Tobias. Now go be with your wife."

I walk cautiously into our bedroom. This is the moment my live will be forever changed. I'm about to meet my son.

I peer into the bedroom and lay my eyes on my wife and son. Beatrice looks simply exhausted. Sweat drenches her hair making it cling to her face, her whole face has a red flush, and her eyes are drooping. She's still the most beautiful woman in the world.

I gently walk to our bed, and I sit myself down beside Beatrice.

"Tobias, I'd like you to meet our son."

My gaze reaches to the small newborn that nuzzles himself into her chest. That's my son. That's our son.

I can't hold back my shock. "He's ours?"

Beatrice lets out a quite giggle. "Of course he is silly." She extends her neck and kisses my cheek lightly. We sit in silence as both of our eyes are transfixed on our son.

"What should we name him, Bea?"

She lets out a soft yawn. "I was thinking we could name him after your grandfather."

"Elijah?"

"Yeah, Elijah."

A smile is plastered on my lips as I think of Elijah. "It's perfect Bea."

She yawns loudly. "Toby, I'm really tired. Why don't you guys have some bonding time while mommy sleeps."

I laugh at her request. "Whatever you need Bea." I take Elijah into my arms and walk to the living room.

I sit on the ratty couch, and adjust him in my arms. I take in all his features at this time. He has dark brown hair, plump pink lips like Beatrice, a hooked nose, and an unknown eye color. He's flawless. I rub my hand on his scruffy hair and think about our future.

Then something suddenly catches my eyes.

He opens his eyes and I lose my breath. His eyes are perfect. They are a mixture of both mine and Beatrice's. Deep dark blue with light blue flecks throughout the mesmerizing orbs. He's perfect.

"Hey there Elijah-" His eyes trail up to mine. "I'm your father." He throws his hands in the air and coos. I chuckle at how adorable he is. "I love you so much. I promise that I will protect you no matter what. I won't let anyone or anything hurt you."

I feel a single tear slip down my cheek. Elijah's alluring blue eyes begin to flutter. In a matter of moments, he's asleep. I still can't believe that in my arms is my breathtaking baby boy. He's the evidence of mine and Beatrice's love for each other. He represents the good in the world.

He is now my world. My everything.

I remain thinking about Elijah for what seems like hours, until I feel my eyes start to become exceedingly heavier than before. I allow the much welcomed sleep consume my body.

_Beatrice and I sit on a pile of hay while we watch the horses. I link my calloused hand with her smaller one. This moment is perfect. _

_I look to my left and see that Beatrice is already staring at me. Her eyes have me in a trance. No matter how many times I look at those blue-grey orbs, they always make my heart skip a beat._

_"I love you Tobias." _

_"I love you more Beatrice." I rest my hand on her swollen stomach. Soon we will have a child. _

_Soon we will have a family._

My blissful dream of the past is interrupted by a potent scent.

Smoke.

My eyes shoot open. I look down into my arms and see that Elijah is still sleeping peacefully. My eyes search around the room and see that the house is filled with blistering flames. My body leaps into action when I hear the sound that makes my heart-break, Beatrice's scream. My sudden abruptness makes Elijah match the sounds his mother makes.

I maneuver my way to the bedroom. The cries of both Elijah and Beatrice makes adrenaline flow through my body. I need to keep Elijah safe. I need to get Beatrice out of this house. I need my family to survive.

Then the unimaginable happens.

I'm half way to the bedroom, when a wooden beam ridden in flames falls upon my lower back.

The impact sends an immense amount of pressure throughout my body. A pressure so powerful, it sends my wailing son out of my arms. Elijah hurls through the air, making his screams become deafening.

I stretch out my arms, in hope of catching him. It doesn't work.

Elijah hits the ground with a heart breaking thud. His cries stop.

My eyes widen as I realize what has just happened. The world around me becomes silent. The only noise to be heard is my heart shattering.

I didn't keep him safe.

I didn't keep my promise.

I need to get out from this beam, and save Beatrice.

The fire progresses up my body. The pain is unbearable.

Beatrice.

I need to save her.

I can't lose both of them.

I use all the force I can, but today isn't my lucky day.

The red inferno is replaced by an oblivion of darkness. The last thing I hear is the screams of my wife.

.

.

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**Present Day**

I'm indestructible. Knives just tickle, bullets leave faint bruises, fire makes me sweat, and hanging my self is like a twisted ride. I can't end it. I can't escape. There's no way out of this never-ending life.

Here's the thing, I can't age and I can't die. I know what you're thinking, but no, I'm not a vampire or anything like that. My skin doesn't shine, I don't have some cool superpower, and I definitely don't eat people. I'm just a normal human. Well, minus having to bear the burden of immortality.

I don't know how it all happened, but I do know one things for sure. It all started after my family died in the blazing sea of flames.

Ever since that day, Tobias has been dead to me. Only one person could ever bring him back, and she's done it thirty-two times. To her I'm Tobias, to everyone else, I'm known as something else.

I'm now Four.

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**Preview For Chapter 1**

_"Hey Toby, can you help me out?" I look to my left and see Beatrice struggling to apply sunscreen on her back. She looks absolutely ridiculous._

_I let out a deep, throaty laugh. Maybe I should play around with her. "I don't know Bea. You seem to be doing a pretty good job on your own."_

_She lets out a flustered sigh and crosses her arms gruffly. "Don't be like this Toby. You know my skin is basically translucent."_

_I send a devious smirk her way and put on my sunglasses. "Well you could use the color then." I close my eyes and lie down on my towel._

_"You suck. Why are we even dating?" I feel coarse sand land on to my stomach. She did not just kick sand on me._

**AN: Okay, so here's the thing. I really hated the old story, so I will be rewriting it. I have written A LOT of short stories and I feel like I've improved as an author. The plot and timeline of this story won't change. The only change that will be prominent is the quality. **

**Peace out Girl Scouts,**

**Hannah**

**P.S **

**I will explain the reason behind him being Four soon. Just hold your horses.  
**


	2. Technical Difficulties

**Losing Count**

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Chapter One: Technical Difficulties

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**AN: Sorry for the wait everyone! Writers block and school are hell. Do you guys still want me to continue this story? Please let me know.**

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The blistering California sun shines in my eyes as I adjust myself on the torrid sand. I can't believe she convinced me to go to the beach. I must truly love her.

"Hey Toby, can you help me out?" I look to my left and see Beatrice struggling to apply sunscreen onto her back. She looks absolutely ridiculous.

I release a deep, throaty laugh. Maybe I should play around with her. "I don't know Bea, you seem to be doing a pretty good job on your own."

She lets out a flustered sigh and crosses her arms gruffly. " Don't be like this Tobias. You know my skin is basically translucent."

I send a devious smirk her way and put on my sunglasses. "Well you could use the colour then." I close my eyes and lie down on my towel.

"You suck. Why are we even dating?" I feel coarse sand land on my stomach. She did not just kick sand on me.

"You did not just do that." I stand up and brush off the sand that lays across my body.

"Maybe I did. Maybe I didn't." It's now her turn to smirk at me.

"Well-" I wrap my arms around her waist and rest my nose on her nose."I think you did it."

She kisses my nose lightly. "Well what would you do if I did?" She leaves light butterfly kisses across my forehead .

I cup her face in my hands and look her in the eyes. "Well I'd start with this-" I leave a trail of kisses down her neck. "And this-" I kiss the spot behind her ear that I know makes her weak in the knees. "And finish off with this." I passionately kiss her lips.

We pull apart for air. She looks at me with a crooked smirk upon her lips. "Too bad I didn't do it."

She struts away into the water. She looks back at me and sends a wink my way before going underwater.

My eyes snap open.

I feel my heart race as a cold sweat glazes over my body. The memories of Beatrice fill my thoughts. A steady stream of tears find their way down my cheeks while her transcending blue eyes tattoo themselves further into my brain.

That day was the thirtieth time Beatrice died.

_"Four?" I look to my left and see Beatrice's friend Myra. Myra and her boyfriend Edward came with us to the beach today. Her face is full of concern "I haven't seen Bea for a few minutes. I'm getting worried."_

_My heart drops.  
_

_No. Not here. Not now. I can't lose her again._

_I stand up and scan the shore. _

_What if she went down and never came back up?_

_"Oh, I think I see her Four!" I look back to Myra and see her pointing to a waving Beatrice. She's out in the water with Edward. _

_She's safe._

_"Guys! Come in! The water-"_

_That's when the boat hit._

This happens every morning.

Every night, memories of her that I have tried so hard to forget, resurface into dreams. I know that I should be grateful that I can even remember a happy time with Beatrice, but all it does is break my heart. Any of those happy memories are always overcome by the nightmares that follow… Overcame by death.

I frantically rub my eyes as I shakily get out of bed. If I'm going to have to live yet another day, I'm going to need some coffee.

I groggily walk towards my kitchen in search of my salvation. I open up the oak cupboard and my eyes find nothing, absolute emptiness.

Just my luck, no coffee.

I absent-mindedly begin to fulfill my morning routine as I daydream about a warm cup of coffee and Beatrice's flowing blonde hair.

.

.

.

I walk down the quiet, early morning, Chicago streets in search of a coffee shop. Crisp winter air consumes my body leaving me numb. My face is numb, my fingers are numb, and as usual, my heart is numb.

"Four? Four! Over here!"

I turn to meet the source of the voice that frantically calls me.

Molly Atwood.

Molly lives in my building. She constantly throws herself at me. It's obnoxious.

"I knew it was you Four! What are you doing out the early? I'm just jogging. You can't get a body like this without a little work." She places her hands on my shoulders but I immediately shake them off.

"I'm just getting breakfast." I turn away from her but she grabs onto me. She's so annoying.

"Are you going to Dauntless Café? It's the only coffee shop around here open this early." Right. I completely forgot about Dauntless.

" I have to go Molly." I turn away from her and quickly head in the direction to Dauntless. I have never been to Dauntless before. Whenever I walk past it, it's always full of people reading poetry. Hopefully there isn't any today.

I reach the coffee shop and immediately regret going inside. At 6:30 in the morning, there is still people reading poetry.

Today is just not my day.

There's no turning back now.

I head towards the ordering line and view the menu. A barista with shaggy blonde hair and green eyes calls to me.

" Excuse me sir, are you ready to order?" He asks me with a wide tooth smile on his face. His name tag reads "Will"

" Um.. Yeah. I'll have a black coffee and a toasted bagel with cream cheese." He punches in my order.

" Okay, your total is $6.75. You can grab a seat and someone will bring you your order."

I hand him the money and mumble thanks as I walk towards the table and chairs.

I sit down and begin to impatiently scroll through my phone as I wait for my breakfast. I hear the chair across from me drag on the floor. Goosebumps rise up my arm with the screeching noise. I hear and exasperated sigh as the person sits down. "I have to say Four, this whole hard to get act is getting really old."

My eyes travel upwards to meet the unpleasant face that belongs to Molly. I rub my hands over my face. Did she follow me here? This woman is getting on my nerves. " It's not an act."

" See?! That's what I mean! You act so cold when I know you're totally into me." She rests her clammy hand on my forearm. Her touch makes me shudder.

I yank my arm away from her. " Molly, I'm not interested in you at all."

" Four, I'm not stupid." Is she serious?

" Molly-" My voice is immediately interrupted.

" Why don't we go on a date to prove your true feelings?" No way in hell.

" No Molly."

" Come on Four! I can see you undress me with your eyes when we talk." She drags her hand across my chest. "Don't you want to see-"

"Molly, I said n-" I begin to stand up, but I'm cut off by a rough, wet, kiss. My body freezes as a thick coat of saliva lines my lips. I feel my body contort in disgust. I hear someone clear their throat from beside us. I immediately push Molly off me.

"Sorry for interrupting." The barista looks at Molly with a deadly glare. "We had some technical difficulties, but it looks like you didn't mind waiting." She returns her focus to me and gives me a look that makes my skin crawl.

Wait.

Those eyes. Only one person could have those captivating blue eyes.

My heart drops to the floor as the realization hits me.

It can't be. She looks so… Different.

"You can continue sucking faces now." She places down my coffee and bagel down and struts away from the table.

Molly continues to ramble on, but I can't focus on whatever the hell it is that she's saying. The only thing I can focus on is her. The girl with the trance inducing blue-grey eyes.

Beatrice.

_It's been a while Bea..._

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**Preview For Chapter 2**

"Miss? I insist you take my umbrella." She looked up at me with her sparkling eyes as her face took on a bewildered expression.

"Oh no. I-I couldn't. I'm already wet, I'd hate for you to get wet too." She looked down bashfully.

"Please, I don't mind getting a little wet. I'd hate for you to get sick." I mocked her slightly hoping that it would put a friendly mood into the conversation.

"Only if we can both share it. Someone as handsome as you shouldn't get too wet." She had a determined look in her eyes and I knew that I couldn't refuse. I know how stubborn she could be. I gave her the friendliest smile I could.

"If you insist." She stood right next to me and then looked right into my eyes.

"I'm Beatrice Prior."

"Tobias. Tobias Eaton."

**AN: To the plethora of people who PMed me saying things such as; "I hate the new story. Just post the old one and continue it." and "You're going to take 5eva and 52 years to get to where you were. I wish you didn't rewrite."**

**I'm sorry but, I thought the old one was shit. In all honesty, I probably wouldn't have continued the old one. I like this one so I'm keeping it.**

**If you don't like it, don't read it.**

**I promise to have a new chapter soon.**

**~Hannah**


	3. Hands Off

**Losing Count**

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Chapter Two: Hands Off

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**AN: Thank you so much for the positive reviews! I didn't think anyone would bother to read this. I'm glad there are some people out there who enjoy my story. Thank you so much! Each review put a big cheesy smile on my face! Alright, now to the story.**

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Short hair instead of long.

This isn't Beatrice.

A mischievous glint rather than an innocent one.

There's no way.

Tattoos on her smooth ivory skin.

She's so different. There has never been a different Beatrice. It's always been the same quiet yet passionate girl. If I didn't see her eyes, I would probably think I was hallucinating. Wait, maybe I am. Maybe this is stress induced.

No.

There's no way anyone, not even me, could duplicate those eyes.

It's already been one week. One week since I actually felt like I was living again.

Molly ruined everything. She probably thinks that Molly is my girlfriend. If I go see Beatrice, she'll think I'm a player. I have to clear things up. I must make things right.

I need to see her, maybe dauntless is still open.

I reach my hand across the rumpled bed sheets until I feel my phone. The screen illuminates the darkened room leaving me momentarily blind.

5:27pm

Dauntless closes at 5pm.

I drag my calloused hands across my face. There goes my plans for tonight. What do I do know? I guess I could go get food. Pizza sounds good.

I climb out of my safe cocoon and get dressed for the outside world. As I pull my shirt over my head, I hear the faint impinging noise of rain. It looks like I'll be taking the bus.

As I walk out the front door I make sure that I have my umbrella. I would hate to get drench in the middle of November. Just because I can't die from hypothermia, doesn't mean I'd like to be uncomfortably wet.

I stand in the elevator waiting for it to descend to the first floor, but it stops at the fourth floor. Please don't let it be-

"Four! Fancy running into you." Molly.

"We live in the same building. We're bound to run into each other."

"Oh Four, you're so funny!" She release an obnoxious, fake laugh and rests her hand upon my shoulder.

I shake her hand off of me as the elevator comes to a stop. "I better be going now."

"Where are you going Four?" She tries to hold me back, but I rip my arm away from her.

"Out." I step out of the building leaving behind an agitated Molly.

I feel rain drops plunge onto my nose as I pull out my umbrella. Quiet drops spill from the sky while faint sounds of cars are heard in the distance. The sound is soothing, almost peaceful.

I reach the bus stop just as the bus I need pulls away. Looks like I'll be waiting here for another ten minutes. I take my phone out of my pocket and begin to chip away the time while waiting. I start to check some of my emails until I hear someone sniffle their nose. I look beside me and see the person I've longed to see.

"Beatrice." Shit.

She turns around with a look that could kill resting upon her face. "Excuse me?" Her hair clings to her face while she noticeably shivers. She's absolutely drenched.

"I said sleepless. This rain will sure give me a sleepless night." A puzzled expression flashes across her face as she nods in response.

"Would you like to use my umbrella?"

She doesn't turn around. she continues to look toward the road. "Nope."

"You're shivering. It's no big deal. My jacket-"

"I said I don't want it."

"You'll catch a cold."

She continues to stare at the road, but her voice contorts into a venomous tone. "You're girlfriend is the one you have to worry about, not me." She remembers me.

"She's not my-"

Beatrice turns around and stares me right in the eyes. "I don't want to hear it." As I stare into her eyes, memories similar to this starts to pop throughout my head.

_The year was 1968 in the large city of New York. I was standing on the side of the road attempting to hail a taxi. Rain suddenly started to come down across the bustling city as I took out my umbrella. I stood there for a few more minutes trying to sign down a taxi, but fate had other plans for me. I heard a quite sneeze come from beside me. I looked over and saw her. Her long wavy hair was now clinging to her face as the rain poured on her. She sneezed a couple more times before I spoke up._

_"Excuse me Miss? I insist you take my umbrella." She looked up at me with her sparkling eyes as her face took on a bewildered expression._

_" Oh no. I-I couldn't. I'm already soaked, and I'd hate for you to get wet too." She looked down bashfully._

_"Please. I don't mind getting a little wet. I'd hate for you to get sick." I mocked her slightly hoping that it would put a friendly mood into the conversation._

_"Only if we can both share it. I meant what I said. I don't want both of us drenched," She had a determined look in her eyes and I knew that I couldn't refuse. I gave her the friendliest smile I could._

_"If you insist." She stood right next to me and then looked deep into my eyes._

_"I'm Beatrice Prior."_

_"Tobias. Tobias Eaton."_

"You don't have to be stubborn. Just take the umbrella, it's no big deal." Maybe she's not as different as I thought.

She rolls her eyes as she turns away from me. "I said I don't want it. I want you to leave-"

"Tris?"

Tris? Does he mean Beatrice?

"Uriah!" Uriah?

"Is something wrong?" Who the hell is this guy?

"No, we were just going. Right Uriah?" Beatr- I mean Tris links her arm with his. What is she doing? She can't like him! They're probably just friends, right?

"Who's this?" Did I just say that out loud?

"Oh Uriah?" Panic is displayed across her face until a solemn look replaces it.

"He's my boyfriend."

My mouth hangs open as she turns around and drags away Uriah.

Her boyfriend.

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**AN: I love you guys.**

**Preview For Chapter 3  
**

"Wait, That's your child?"

**Peace out Girl Scouts.**

**~Hannah**


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